“Great Vacation Rental Available”

My latest McSweeney’s piece… inspired by an apartment rental experience… which did not result in my wife getting kidnapped by bandits, fortunately.

You can walk to a train station in 15 minutes, unless you prefer to walk along paved roads, in which case it will take slightly more than a day. You can also walk to a bus station, but the buses stopped running in 1974. I have extra transit tickets in my desk drawer, next to the loaded handgun, inside the DVD case labeled SECRET RECORDINGS OF PREVIOUS GUESTS. You are welcome to them.

Here’s the link.

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